Pecan & coconut brownies

Coconut pecan brownies

Coconut pecan brownies

There’s an ad I’ve been seeing a lot lately, when I try to watch my shows on the computer. It promises an “all new more everything plan,” and it’s only a slight exaggeration to say that it has me teetering on the thin line between amusement and despair. First of all, do we really need to reinforce the image of Americans as inarticulate greedy toddlers? MORE MORE MORE NEW NEW NEW!! No, we don’t, we truly don’t. Second of all, thank you once again, marketing-Americans for reducing words to a state of flaccid meaninglessness. It’s like a drug, it started with fairly mild words, “wholesome” or “goodness,” words that most actual people don’t actually use very often and that never had that much vitality. But our tolerance for those words grew to the point that we don’t even notice them anymore, it’s like we didn’t even hear them. So it spread to words that once had some power and complexity, “awesome,” “extreme,” even “power” itself. And now those have about as much flavor as gum that’s been chewed up, spit out, and stuck to the bottom of somebody’s shoe for a few weeks. So it’s on to the really big words. What’s bigger than everything? And this is the idea that keeps going around and around in my head. Everything? Really? More everything? More money, more sunshine, more inspiration, more creativity, more good-will, more intelligence, more patience, more ice cream cones, more cool non-leather shoes, more homes for stray dogs, more empathy for everyone in the world? And then, the next logical question…more everything? Are you sure? More poverty, more rain, more earthquakes, more misunderstanding, more tetanus shots, more rotten raspberries in a bowl that looked so perfect, more war, more hatred, more chaos, more ignorance, more cruelty? More of all of that? And more nothing? Because that’s part of everything, too, isn’t it? Anything, something, nothing, it’s all part of everything. Does this all-new plan offer a glimpse into the abyss? Because I’m not sure I’m ready for that. I’m not ready for all being and nothingness. So be careful what you sign up for, read the fine print, and ask yourself if you’re prepared to take on the extreme awesome power of the all new everything plan.

Coconut pecan brownies

Coconut pecan brownies

Speaking of everything, these wholesomely delicious brownies have it all! They’re soft and flavorful with a crispy top. They have a nice texture because of the coconut and pecans, which are both ground up so that they’re surprising but recognizable.

Here’s The Ramones with I Wanted Everything.

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Coconut chocolate brownies

Coconut chocolate brownies

Coconut chocolate brownies

After the school dance, a man set up a ladder and cut down all the stars. Malcolm stood below and caught them as they fell. He walked home with an armful of stars, trailing yellow balloons behind him like wings. I love the morning after any balloon-related event. The balloons seem tired, and if you give them a little tug, they don’t quite make it back to the ceiling. This is my favorite time to take pictures – I like it much better than during the party itself. I love the boys in their pajamas batting balloons back and forth or racing around the house with them. The morning light hanging in the balloons like fire, lighting them with a warm glow from within, making them almost as bright and buoyant as my boys. I took so many photos this weekend, of the boys and their balloons – I took hundreds! I lay on the ground for some, looking up at their laughing faces, and up the strings to the golden balloons. (I had just seen an Ozu movie!) I was so happy with them that I didn’t even look at them right away. I saved them for after work. And when I loaded them onto the computer I could see the tantalizing little thumbnails of the shots vivid with our green walls, strong morning light and radiant boys. But the pictures never loaded. I never got to see them, I lost them all, and all of the photos from the dance. I feel such irrational regret about this loss. They’re just pictures! David and I tell ourselves all the time not to experience our life through a lens. We want to capture every moment and remember every movement, but sometimes we have to just put the camera down and live it. Trust our eyes, trust our memory. I know that. So why do I feel such an odd small pang of nostalgia for these pictures I’ll never see? I suppose it’s like the films I make in my dreams. So perfect and unattainable – so perfect because you can never see it as it really is, because things always look better caught sideways in glimpses, memories, and dreams. Oh, well, there will always be more balloons!!

These brownies have coconut milk in them, which makes them soft and almost pudding-like. They also have flaked coconut and chocolate chips, which makes them delicious! They’re not terribly sweet, and I used very very dark cocoa, which almost has a savory flavor to it, according to my taster. You could use regular cocoa, though, and they’d still be tasty.

Here’s the Beastie Boys with Root Down (Pp balloon mix)

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